Pitched Fork

9 December 2008 | 12:40 AM

As someone who grew up wanting to be Gopher on The Love Boat (hey, he got to wear shorts all day, every day, at work) I, like many Americans, still have a little non-cynical spot in my heart for the luxury cruise lines. Sure, every year we hear a story about three thousand passengers getting sick at sea with the novovirus, or that another cruise ship has fallen to Somali pirates and is being ransomed for millions of dollars in some Sri Lankan hell-hole, but those are mere blips on the radar for an industry who’s given millions of satisfied travelers easy access to buy trinkets in Mazatlan, provided convenient ways to smuggle Guatemalan babies back to the States and even ensured Charro had a job. That said, you might want to skip dining on the high seas after seeing this little video clip:

Skip head to about, oh, 1:25-ish and you’ll see the fun begin. Emphasis on “high seas”, right? Yikes. I guess now we know why all of the Love Boat passengers spent most of their time at Isaac’s bar.

Posted by Andy in Ummm...?